Well, they did it. I'm actually kind of glad that they did it.
The Lions have finally shown themselves to be the team I always knew that they were.
I took a look at the various webernet sports-yak message boards which are genarally forums for small-minded people to spout-off hateful things in semi-anonymity that would never be acceptable in polite society (the political sphere is not part of polite society). But the triumphalism, civic chauvinism, and juvenile taunting that normally passes for discourse in these forums was (largely) replaced by something far worse: abject pity for the team, the city, and (especially) the fans. No hate, no disdain, just pity.
I don't know what else to say about them. They cannot get worse. They will refuse to improve. I interact with a lot of fans of other teams at work who remind me of all the good draft picks that we'll get next year. I'm not sure they understand the nature of futility in the same way that Lions fans do. They will squander their draft picks on more highly athletic players with attitude problems, or that play glamor positions and will not make them better (or both).
This is a team that deserves no wins.
This is a team that deserves no TV air time, being regularly blacked out.
This is a team that deserves no free agents that can sign anywhere else.
And this is a team that has embraced losing at all levels and that deserves not another line of text on this blog... despite how easy of a topic it is.
Showing posts with label Lions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lions. Show all posts
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Monday, October 6, 2008
Even Less Impressive In Person
Unholy f***er of mothers! The Lions were awful.
The Bears fans were nearly as numerous as Lions fans, much more vocal, and were way more likely to stay to the end of the game (4 to 1 margin, at least). Out of a masochistic sense of duty, I stayed to watch every last impotent gasp of failure and sub-mediocrity that the Lions put forth until the clock ticked to 0:00.
This is a team that isn't afraid to be a laughingstock. They are as far beyond laughingstock as a quasar is beyond an off-brand AAA battery. They have reached the point where Schadenfreude turns off, irony cannot insulate your senses, and we as a species of humans have to stop, take stock, and feel humbled, confused, and ashamed that this sad example of institutional failure and stupidity has somehow oozed its sorry way to a playing field from among our number (Similar to any enterprise headed by an MBA). They are going through the motions of playing professional football, but are already mentally, morally, and emotionally checked out.
Beating this team in football is like beating up a mentally handicapped, blind, quadriplegic,... pacifist... with very advanced osteoporosis. I'm not sure how an opposing team can derive any sort of enjoyment from the process. If I were a Bears player after the game yesterday, instead feeling triumphant, I would feel dirty. Dirty, ashamed, and a little sick to my stomach that my job forced me to come into such close, nearly intimate, personal contact with this sad bunch of contemptible cowards who dare to claim the moniker of "professional" athlete. I might consider demanding a written apology from the team for the very direct insult that the Lions' level of play represents to them and to the rest of the league (and to the idea of professional, spectator sports in general).
My favorite moment of the game was, after managing to grab a turnover down near the goal-line, the Lions did score a touchdown making the score 31-7. The Lions players on the field celebrated like they just won the game, and they actually had the gall to have some guy come on the P.A. and sing their ridiculous "fight song" which, I kid you not, goes like this:
I laughed till I hurt.
The Bears fans were nearly as numerous as Lions fans, much more vocal, and were way more likely to stay to the end of the game (4 to 1 margin, at least). Out of a masochistic sense of duty, I stayed to watch every last impotent gasp of failure and sub-mediocrity that the Lions put forth until the clock ticked to 0:00.
This is a team that isn't afraid to be a laughingstock. They are as far beyond laughingstock as a quasar is beyond an off-brand AAA battery. They have reached the point where Schadenfreude turns off, irony cannot insulate your senses, and we as a species of humans have to stop, take stock, and feel humbled, confused, and ashamed that this sad example of institutional failure and stupidity has somehow oozed its sorry way to a playing field from among our number (Similar to any enterprise headed by an MBA). They are going through the motions of playing professional football, but are already mentally, morally, and emotionally checked out.
Beating this team in football is like beating up a mentally handicapped, blind, quadriplegic,... pacifist... with very advanced osteoporosis. I'm not sure how an opposing team can derive any sort of enjoyment from the process. If I were a Bears player after the game yesterday, instead feeling triumphant, I would feel dirty. Dirty, ashamed, and a little sick to my stomach that my job forced me to come into such close, nearly intimate, personal contact with this sad bunch of contemptible cowards who dare to claim the moniker of "professional" athlete. I might consider demanding a written apology from the team for the very direct insult that the Lions' level of play represents to them and to the rest of the league (and to the idea of professional, spectator sports in general).
My favorite moment of the game was, after managing to grab a turnover down near the goal-line, the Lions did score a touchdown making the score 31-7. The Lions players on the field celebrated like they just won the game, and they actually had the gall to have some guy come on the P.A. and sing their ridiculous "fight song" which, I kid you not, goes like this:
Lyrics to Gridiron Heroes(Source: Lions Website)
(The Victory Song of the Detroit Lions)
(Verse)
Hail the colors Blue and Silver let them wave.
Sing their song and cheer the Gridiron Heroes brave,
Fighting for fame, winning the game,
Dashing to victory as they go.
(Chorus)
Forward down the field,
A charging team that will not yield.
And when the Blue and Silver wave,
Stand and cheer the brave.
Rah, Rah, Rah.
Go hard, win the game.
With honor you will keep your fame.
Down the field and gain,
A Lion victory!
I laughed till I hurt.
Friday, October 3, 2008
Goodbye to Matt
John U. Bacon bid farewell to Matt Millen today:
Good Riddance to Millen
He did a good job in summarizing the prevailing mood regarding Millen, the Lions, and their ownership. He did also point out something positive that I'd forgotten about Lions ownership (easy thing to do), and that was their willingness to build a new stadium and stay in town with very little in the way of public financing (bribes from the city and state). Many other NFL franchises extort stadium money or they threaten to bolt to another city... on the other hand, if the Lions ever did "threaten" to leave town, I'd chip in a few bucks to help see them on their way.
On a related note, the Official Husband of the Official Middle Sister of the Official Wife of the (officious) Sarcastic Weasel is a Bears fan and has tickets for the upcoming Bears game. The Sarcastic Weasel is invited. I'll go, but the Bears game happens to be in Detroit and I now have to decide, should I get/borrow some Bears paraphernalia to wear, or should I consider donning the internationally recognized Lions fan game-day apparel shown below:
(picture source: NY Times Website: Carlos Osorio/Associated Press)
Good Riddance to Millen
He did a good job in summarizing the prevailing mood regarding Millen, the Lions, and their ownership. He did also point out something positive that I'd forgotten about Lions ownership (easy thing to do), and that was their willingness to build a new stadium and stay in town with very little in the way of public financing (bribes from the city and state). Many other NFL franchises extort stadium money or they threaten to bolt to another city... on the other hand, if the Lions ever did "threaten" to leave town, I'd chip in a few bucks to help see them on their way.
On a related note, the Official Husband of the Official Middle Sister of the Official Wife of the (officious) Sarcastic Weasel is a Bears fan and has tickets for the upcoming Bears game. The Sarcastic Weasel is invited. I'll go, but the Bears game happens to be in Detroit and I now have to decide, should I get/borrow some Bears paraphernalia to wear, or should I consider donning the internationally recognized Lions fan game-day apparel shown below:
(picture source: NY Times Website: Carlos Osorio/Associated Press)
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