Sunday, December 28, 2008

Zero and Sixteen

Well, they did it. I'm actually kind of glad that they did it.

The Lions have finally shown themselves to be the team I always knew that they were.

I took a look at the various webernet sports-yak message boards which are genarally forums for small-minded people to spout-off hateful things in semi-anonymity that would never be acceptable in polite society (the political sphere is not part of polite society). But the triumphalism, civic chauvinism, and juvenile taunting that normally passes for discourse in these forums was (largely) replaced by something far worse: abject pity for the team, the city, and (especially) the fans. No hate, no disdain, just pity.

I don't know what else to say about them. They cannot get worse. They will refuse to improve. I interact with a lot of fans of other teams at work who remind me of all the good draft picks that we'll get next year. I'm not sure they understand the nature of futility in the same way that Lions fans do. They will squander their draft picks on more highly athletic players with attitude problems, or that play glamor positions and will not make them better (or both).

This is a team that deserves no wins.
This is a team that deserves no TV air time, being regularly blacked out.
This is a team that deserves no free agents that can sign anywhere else.
And this is a team that has embraced losing at all levels and that deserves not another line of text on this blog... despite how easy of a topic it is.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008


Lolcats X-mas Carrol:

Fa La La La La La La La La.
Tis teh seezun 2 b jolly.
Fa La La La La La La La La.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Weasel Meme vs The Cats

I really don't want to be a heel and poke fun at the Humane Society.

They really do a lot of good for animals. Yes, there are some euthanasia issues that I've heard that are not unreasonable things to be concerned about, but on the whole, they are not a ridicule worthy institution.

Still, in preparing for the Weasel Meme's arrival, I ran into these "helpful" hints for introducing your pets to a new baby:

I'm sorry, but bullet point number 14 deserves... at least a little ridicule:

Talk to your pet about the baby, using the baby's name if you've selected one.

I'm a fan of reason, but come on. I love how you are encouraged to use the forthcoming little bugger's name in order to get your pet used to hearing it. But they seem to indicate that, if you have not picked a name yet, this exercise will have some kind of benefit. People already mistake their pets for people, projecting onto them human attributes and motivations, with disastrous consequences (watch any episode of the Dog Whisperer). IT'S A CAT!!! THEY DON'T SPEAK HUMAN!!!1! Not even this well!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Guest Post (Sort of)

The Sarcastic Weasel is somewhere deeper than neck deep in research commitments that are behind schedule or on their way to being behind schedule. Hence, he is avoiding unproductive and optional activities such as sleeping, eating, breathing, and blogging.

To tide you until I reengage in some of the aforementioned activities, here is a video suggestion from bunny aficionado and Official Sister of the Sarcastic Weasel, Jen.

Many lessons are apparent from this video. First, bunnies are evil, but the need some help from headless Donald Trump figures and silent headless ladies with abundant cleavage. Second, internet videos are not required to make sense. Third, bunnies are really evil. Fourth, I think that the Official Sister of the Sarcastic Weasel is paying me back for making her watch The Maxx, in all its MTV-ized, existential, affected, low-budget weirdness.

I'm sure other lessons will become apparent to you as you watch this video again and again while waiting for my triumphant return to the internets. feel free to comment on what you learned in to appropriate message boardy forum that might be attached to the end of this post.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Igor Larinov Wines

My favorite? The Triple Overtime Zinfandel. Not that I've had it... or any of them. I like the name. That's all... And the pic of the Professor relaxing and maxing behind a fancy desk.

This is even better than the Dominik Hasek Hot Sauce.