April First Blog Entry

Today is officially the single most moronic "holiday" on the calender. Yes, even dumber than National Date Nut Bread and Pardon Day (9/8). April Fool's Day grates on the Sarcastic Weasel's nerves like no other idiot concept... except perhaps multi-level marketing.

One might think that, given my strong discordian tendencies, my mild sadistic streak, and the fact that I am known in the blogosphere as the "Really Sarcastic Weasel" that I would embrace the practical jokes and pranking that accompany this inane day. But practical jokes have never really amused me; instead, they've always just pissed me off. The dishonesty that lies at the heart of any such practical joke is, I think, what really grates my nerves. To me, a thing is only funny if it is based on truth. In fact, a large part of the truly copious amount of sarcasm that the Sarcastic Weasel employs is just a way to state socially awkward truths (by telling intrinsically obvious falsehoods) in a way that is less socially unacceptable. I suspect that this is the root of much sarcasm. Obviously, within any community, total honesty between its members would lead very quickly to its demise thus necessitating the small fibs, lies of omission, and acts keeping your big mouth shut that prevent us from being considered anti-social, and/or being ostracized/pummeled on a daily basis. But the willful subversion of the truth (or what we believe to be the truth) for no benefit other than mischief undermines the very notion of truth, our society, and ourselves.

So, before you tell your co-workers that you accidentally erased their hard drive, or your "friend" that that you're moving to Nepal, or your spouse that you won the lottery, remember that, as a race, we human beings have many impediments to our ability to understand the universe. We have prejudices, irrational agendas, limited time, limited intellect, and limited memory. There may exist whole classes of things that we are not equipped to observe, directly or indirectly that we can never come to grips with. That doesn't mean that we have a right to abdicate our duty to the search for truth. There exist so many reasons for falsehood that, while ultimately poor reasons, do offer short-term practical gain, but so-called "practical" joke don't even offer that. Do not increase the obstacles that we face today. Use today to tear them down. Use today to be truthful... that will get a bigger response anyway.